blogging title: do u love me?

15.11.2012
that day was a very special day, because it was the monthly anniversary. *smile*
Life doesn't always go as what we expected, so, appreciating things before it is too late. BUT, people tend not to appreciate when they realized that this thing, this person are belonged to you..
I am sorry if i did make him felt like I never appreciated Mr.boyfie. Sometimes, something, I didn't bother to show because i thought he would understand. I didn't comfort back, because I know he will come to me. I never thought that he might actually needed a moment to be comforted too. My bad!! :(
He made me so guilty because He said I acted coldly when with him.

ottoke?
The love is real, sincere...

holiday

this feeling is so weird.
The moment when exam ended, I do felt like heaven, like exam has FINALLY ended.
But after a few hours of relaxing, I felt like how the exam ended so fast that I am currently so aimlessly enjoying my life. Humans, maybe we don't appreciate much when the time has finally came. Just like when holiday starts, I feeling as normal and i started to wonder, what should i do in this period of time though I've been wanted this day to come during the start of exam. But when this day has finally came, it is not much excited. Probably no one could understand my feeling. *laugh*
Have been contradicting to myself recently, -to be continued-

oh ya, my blog is renovating!!!. Since holiday has just started, i have nth much to do, so im changing to a new blog skin. Stay tune!!.

feelings

So much happening recently that I couldn't spit out everything with just a post. And, I'm having final exams now, so.. I am ultimate sorry that I have ignored all the people that wished to chat with me, date me out and all sorts. I wasn't having time to enjoy my life just yet!. having a very pathetic life . And ya, I have deactivated my official fb account just so u know, I am an active fb-er and it was hard to concentrate on studying while my account is here. So, I would activate back it just soon. Be patient!

Dear Priscilla: I saw your comment! :) Date me after exam!! *hugs and kisses*

How should I start?
the feelings I wanted to express now, it isn't something easy to describe. Sometimes, I really do wonder, "how long would we last?" We differed from the the head to the toe. It seems that we both came from different world. Your world = full of obstacles, Was, present and might be future that I wouldn't understand. The difference appearing huge from what I can see and I believe you feel it. Your world = full of experiences,  if you insisted to ask me in what terms. I would say, the things that I did not, wouldn't or probably will not experience. Your world = complicated, it was so hard to understand sometimes, I felt like you so differed from other ordinary boys that I'm closed with.

Is it because I behaved like a kid? Were you trying to protect and babysit me like I used to joke around?
I tried super hard to understand you. What were you thinking, how do u feel about me. what should I do to make you feel you better. Seriously, what are you? You always said, you wished to understand me more, but deep down my heart, that's the question i wished to ask you too. But I afraid, what I am isn't the one you want. I afraid, we weren't meant to be.
Probably I'm having so much worries that I'm so scared, I'm not the most suitable for you. I asked you, what's your ideal type of girls before you've met me. That was because I'm afraid, I wanted to know... "Have I met the requirement?" I really don't understand why you've chosen me out of many, office ladies, your college girls. many choices, and what I am? A girl that wouldn't sponsor you money, pampered, hot-tempered, money-spending, "manja"-princess personalities..
Sigh!! I have many doubts in my mind, but I am afraid to ask, that was why i kept silence, Not because of the bossy attitude that i didn't want to tell. I just don't want to listen the answers. I couldn't bear any heartbreaks.

I know sometimes I've hurt you, and I really apologize for that. Part of it, I was protecting myself from getting hurt from you. My heart is fragile! I am sorry, I was being very stingy!. :(